By request, the pictures of Rag Day 2004 have been put up, to build anticipation for Rag 2005. Raggers are crazy people who take an absurd amount of pride in their work (haha). The pictures I have of this year’s float are considered classified material, so they’ll only be put up after the main event. I’m hoping to capture better pictures this year, since last year all I had was a camera-phone.

According to a certain mad ragger, the connection between Rag and Flag is as follows: NUS sends its students out to collect donations for charity. This is Flag Day. Rag Day follows later, as a form of appreciation to the public for their donations. I think it’s called Rag Day because the floats are made out of recycled materials. *shrugs* No idea, really. More like the float engineers are being run ragged, hahaha…

This is last year’s float, the main theme being the battle between Good and Evil. Don’t need to elaborate more than that.

Look at the painstaking detailing on the Scorpion! Each scale is a piece of metal, cut by hand, hammered by hand and attached one by one to the main frame. I tell you. The scale of the work done, and the man-hours involved, are staggering. Once more: Raggers are crazy people.

Raggers took a page out of Peter Jackson’s book and made their own chain-mail.

Rag Day 2005 will be at NUS Sports and Recreation Centre on Saturday, the 6th of August. I believe the public is invited, although seats will be limited. Also, be prepared for noisy cheers from overexcited young people. Heh.

Wah damn fuming angry now. Freshmen with no respect for seniors. You don’t come for the programme? Fine. You dowan to run with us? Also fine. But you dare to retort so rudely to me? Not fine. Try that line again on any senior and if the girls don’t bitch-slap you, the boys will. But we are a nice hall. No physical violence wan. So we will cold-freeze you out of our comms. Rude little bitch.

What happened is, Ehoc were preparing for the finale of the Orientation programme. Towards this endeavour, we were herding the freshmen to the hall to assemble them. I was hanging about near the bus stop. Yes I was being extra. So along comes this girl and boy, and one of the people in charge asks me to tell them to go to the function hall.

Now I’m very polite wan ok? So I ask them nicely, are you going to the function hall? No, replies the girl, and she keeps walking. Oh well. What to do. Person-in-charge asks me to inform them that there is an activity going on. Well ok. I go back to them and ask, Excuse me, there’s an activity going on at the function hall.

The little bitch turns around and spews, Can you stop interrupting me? Not so much as a please or a sorry. Just like that. Well, well. Obviously whatever you were saying is SOOOOO important that you would tell someone off like that.

Look, I know not all freshmen enjoy orientation. If you’re not going, just say sorry, I’m not interested, I have other plans. Fine. But to be so rude, as if I was bugging her nineteen to the dozen “Can you please go to the function hall now it’s a really important activity the programmers have really put a lot of effort into it you’re sure to enjoy it please go this way”… I can only put it down as rudeness.

She’s probably the kind of person who tells salespeople “Go away and let me shop in peace” instead of “Sorry, I’m just looking”. There is a way to tell people nicely to go fly kite. Apparently she hasn’t heard of it.

The other seniors tried to appease me, and one suggested, Haha you should have taken her picture then we can know not to let her into our committees. Ah, what a lovely revenge, if only a bit wishful. Comms being what they are, it’s hard to reject people when you desperately need manpower. And even if she proves to be a selfish bitch, chances are the rest of the comm will just keep quiet and hope she gets her comeuppance come evaluation time.

But I don’t think she’ll join any committees. Her jersey said Singapore Schools on the back. Oh, wow, a national athlete. Yes yes, we’re so desperate to keep you that we, the seniors, will just put up with whatever shit you dish out, simply because we’re in dire need of sports talent. Sadly, I know that is closer to the truth than I like to admit.

The only recourse left for my anger is to hope that she gets kicked out of hall for not participating in enough activities. Hah!

p/s: I have nothing against athletes, or against people getting kicked out of hall because they weren’t involved enough. But someone with that attitude doesn’t deserve a place in hall, when there’s someone out there who’s nicer and cheerier and more polite. After all, the sports is only for one season. And lack of one more athlete can be overcome. But a bad attitude poisons the hall spirit. Yes, I may be speaking from wounded pride, but to see how low Eusoff has fallen breaks my heart.

Breathe, breathe. Now the anger has dissipated and I shall let this bother me no more. On with life!

NTU’s orientation has a lot of boy-girl bonding. Ew. Guys doing pushups while girls lie under them? That’s really disturbing. But today I witnessed something so disturbing, it definitely has to be rated 18-SX (for audiences above 18 years, contains sexual content).

Orientation started on Thursday last week with ice-breakers, but nothing interesting happened there so I didn’t take pictures. I could have joined them yesterday when the freshies went around Noose, but the idea of running around a hilly campus late at night when I could be, er, vegetating in my room, did not appeal to me. (Sorry Ehoc.)

Today, however, they had the talentime, with all the lame jokes and off-colour references that usually accompany the words “come up with a skit”. I mean, one of the things they had to mention was a Greek condom, so you can see what kind of ideas they’re trying to plant in little freshies’ heads… by the way, I am the same age or older than all the freshies, boys and girls included. (Boys are 2 years older than the girls cos they serve Army.) So I reserve the right to sound like an old auntie and call them kids.

One skit was particularly off-colour, and I have a video to prove it… but I shan’t post it up because it is really in bad taste. All I will say is that it involved simulated sex. Very realistic simulated sex. *shudders just thinking about it* Thank goodness the Resident Fellows were quite lenient and did not give the group a dressing-down for the explicitness of their performance. When I was new in junior college, the boys in my orientation group did a half-monty striptease. The vice-principal was waiting for them backstage with a black, scowling face. “Where are my strippers?” he demanded. And no one was in the mood to laugh. Brrrr.

Some competitions were also on the programme, notably the one for which I was the reigning champion. I’ve never blogged about it before, since it happened pre-blog, but it’s basically a talking competition where they give you a topic and you go on about it for some time. You are perfectly welcome to digress from the topic, as that is the best way to fill up time (and also most entertaining for the audience). Ah, those were the days. My glorious reign (hahaha) is now over, and someone else will have to shoulder the responsibility of being the fastest mouth in the West.

It was very nice of Ehoc to ask me to present the trophy. I was in attendance at the talentime because I was on duty with the tech crew, but I guess since I was there, it’d look nice if they got me to present the prize. And they were kind enough to let me have the mike for a couple of minutes, whereby I proved how I had won the title last year. Yay.

There were some other competitions but I don’t think the contestants will appreciate the publicity. And I’m too lazy to ask all of them for permission to publish, and anyway none were as scandalous as the skit.

Oh, and I took my cousin to McDonalds for lunch, and I noticed their tray liner:

Why is it that only mums will be happy about their balanced meals? Why not parents? Don’t dads care what their kids ingest? I know my dad’s always telling me to eat more fruit. Or maybe only mums will actually pester McD’s to include more healthful options, whereas dads generally accept that McD’s is probably not the place to seek healthful food.

My sore throat has been supplanted by a dry cough, arising from a tickle in the throat. It’s so annoying. At least a sore throat was silent. It hurt so badly yesterday that I took 2 Panadols before bed, and tada! The pain was gone in the morning. Now if only the cough would take a hint.

I Gizoogled my blog to ‘gangstarize’ it, and the end result is hilarious. Even better if you read it out aloud to get the full impact, mah brotha! Oh and there’s a bit of profanity involved, so if ya don’t like that shizzle you oughta get the hella outta hiah.

I D-to-tha-izzon’t know if there’s really such a word as ‘illy’ as in ‘ill-y’ but it sounds F-U-Double-Nizzy anyway. I hizzle bizzle dizzle wit a sore throat n yesterday I was hatin’ a baller. I’m pretty mizzay aight now, except that I occasionally fizzy like ripp’n mah own throat out ta immerse it in ice wanna be gangsta ta soothe tha pain. I’d stick jizzay mah neck in, but since it’s attached at one end ta mah heezee, n at tha playa ta mah torso, it makes it a leetle bit difficult like old skool shit. And I C-to-tha-izzan’t actually driznink ice wata since
a) it is believed ta be ‘heaty’ n hence would makes mah throat worse n
b) it gives me stomachizzles.

Anyway tha new freshmen have moved into hall n generally I don’t see miznuch of them, which is good. Freshies should gangsta be seen nor heard. (insert disdainful senior playa here.) Howeva, as I was finish’n mah brotha I heard distinct lian-speak com’n fizzy tha cubicles nearby. It is jizzust so painfully obvious that they is Singapizzles (which in itself is not so bizzy n tizzle they were a shade too ah-lian fo` mah taste . Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. I don’t recall hav’n heard so many ‘lehs’, ‘lars’ n ‘hors’ in a sentence since, like, I dunno . Boom bam as I step in the jam, God damn. Yes yes I kizzle that I, a Malaysian, also use these terms, but certainly I do not use tizzle in S-to-tha-izzuch massive doses. Worse thizzan tha ‘lahs’, I find, is tha nasal manna in whizzay they speak. A foreigna can shot calla tha ‘lahs’ but you can always tell a true-blue lian by tha slightly nasal intonation . Nigga get shut up or get wet up. And it’s only tha bitchez. I dizzon’t hizzy tha boys rhymin’ like tizzy so jus’ chill.

And don’t jizzy on tha politizzle correctness bandwagon n tizzay me tizzle it’s mizzle ta dislike ah lians. Agagooga doesn’t like tizzle eitha, n I’m wit him on that . I started yo shit and i’ll end yo’ shit.

So anyway, W-H-to-tha-izzen I exited tha showa cubicle, I turned ta see all 4 of tha ridin’ cubicles occupied by said ah lians. I detest this practice of group cruisin’ simply coz bizzy in mah fiznirst hostel, we had stupid immature secondary schoo` bitchez who would hog all available cubicles n commence a 30-minute showa mah nizzle. Plus I jizzust D-to-tha-izzon’t git it . Subscribe nigga, get yo issue.. Why Mizzle you all showa wanna be gangsta? I kizzle there is lizards n pimp in tha cubicles, but I think that’s as creepy as it gets cuz its a G thang. No uninvited guests fizzle tha Brotha side’, n anyway it’s only 11.30 pm W-H-to-tha-izzich is plenty early ta hizzle residents. What’s there ta be scared of?

I’d pizzack them off ta an Army camp ta see how tha boys can playa in 5 minutes wit minimum fuss fo’ real. I believe it’s all that inta-cubicle ballin’ T-H-to-tha-izzat takes up so much of they time. If they continue this practice dur’n Orientation, it will makes them hugely unpopular, coz dur’n Orientation we play such messy n dirty games thiznat everyone rushes ta tha showa immediately afterward. And pimpin’ ta endure tha sweat n grime while a bunch of ah lians takes they own sweet time is quite unreasonable mah nizzle.

Some thugz just aren’t meant ta live in hostels.

Anyway, on tha way bizzle ta hizzall tha cracka night, I saw a beautiful fizzy mizzle. It was `bout 9 pm so tha mizzy was still pretty low, n it looked hizzle n round. I tried ta takes a picture of it, whizzich as it turns out, doesn’t do it tha slightest bit of justice so show some love niggaz. You need a pro camera fo` moon shots, I think, so you can zoom in a whole lot. And so yo flash can illuminate tha foreground properly . Dogg House Records in the motha fuckin house.

Our Yousucks Adventure cizzay was cancelled at tha last minute, as most of tha freshmen had not matriculated n hence wizzle not considered ‘real’ NUS students, hence tizzle could not go `bout on hiznall camps due ta safety issues. Boo like a tru playa’. W-H-to-tha-izzat a pity . know what im sayin?. The bus wizzy alllll tha way ta tha Far East of Singapore (we is in tha wiznest) n alllll tha way bizzle . Snoop dogg is in this bitch. I’d say it was at least a mini-road triznip fo` tha freshmen, but since tha bus used tha expressway, I doubt there was miznuch ta see. Bah humbug droppin hits. I wasn’t on tha bus. I was sick in bed.

And nizzy a F-U-Double-Nizzy nonsensizzle story ta round up tha day:
I was sett’n up mah rappa yesterday n shit. Everyth’n was plugged in, tha socket switch was on, n I pressed tha button. Noth’n. Wussup to all my niggaz in the house. I pressed it again n again. Still noth’n. Changed tha plug location ta playa socket. Noth’n. I started ta panic coz tha homey who stored mah printa fo` me had jokingly told me thizzay it was damaged, n I began ta think thizzat maybe he wasn’t gang bangin’ pimp all . They call me tha black folks president. I took a good look at mah brotha n realised I had been press’n tha ‘Resume’ button instead of tha Powa button cuz this is how we do it. Gaaaahhh yeah yeah baby!
(I can differentiate them nizzle even wit mah eyes closed so bow down to the bow wow. The Powa button has a tiny raised dot in tha middle of it.)
In mitigizzle I W-to-tha-izzill claim that I was sizzick n feverish.

I don’t know if there’s really such a word as ‘illy’ as in ‘ill-y’ but it sounds funny anyway. I have been down with a sore throat and yesterday I was running a fever. I’m pretty much okay now, except that I occasionally feel like ripping my own throat out to immerse it in ice water to soothe the pain. I’d stick just my neck in, but since it’s attached at one end to my head, and at the other to my torso, it makes it a leetle bit difficult. And I can’t actually drink ice water since
a) it is believed to be ‘heaty’ and hence would make my throat worse and
b) it gives me stomachaches.

Anyway the new freshmen have moved into hall and generally I don’t see much of them, which is good. Freshies should neither be seen nor heard. (insert disdainful senior sneer here.) However, as I was finishing my shower, I heard distinct lian-speak coming from the cubicles nearby. It is just so painfully obvious that they are Singaporean (which in itself is not so bad) and that they were a shade too ah-lian for my taste. I don’t recall having heard so many ‘lehs’, ‘lars’ and ‘hors’ in a sentence since, like, I dunno. Yes yes I know that I, a Malaysian, also use these terms, but certainly I do not use them in such massive doses. Worse than the ‘lahs’, I find, is the nasal manner in which they speak. A foreigner can master the ‘lahs’ but you can always tell a true-blue lian by the slightly nasal intonation. And it’s only the girls. I don’t hear the boys speaking like that.

And don’t jump on the political correctness bandwagon and tell me that it’s mean to dislike ah lians. Agagooga doesn’t like them either, and I’m with him on that.

So anyway, when I exited the shower cubicle, I turned to see all 4 of the remaining cubicles occupied by said ah lians. I detest this practice of group bathing, simply because back in my first hostel, we had stupid immature secondary school girls who would hog all available cubicles and commence a 30-minute shower. Plus I just don’t get it. Why MUST you all shower together? I know there are lizards and spiders in the cubicles, but I think that’s as creepy as it gets. No uninvited guests from the ‘other side’, and anyway it’s only 11.30 pm which is plenty early to hall residents. What’s there to be scared of?

I’d pack them off to an Army camp to see how the boys can shower in 5 minutes with minimum fuss. I believe it’s all that inter-cubicle chatting that takes up so much of their time. If they continue this practice during Orientation, it will make them hugely unpopular, because during Orientation we play such messy and dirty games that everyone rushes to the showers immediately afterward. And having to endure the sweat and grime while a bunch of ah lians takes their own sweet time is quite unreasonable.

Some people just aren’t meant to live in hostels.

Anyway, on the way back to hall the other night, I saw a beautiful full moon. It was about 9 pm so the moon was still pretty low, and it looked huge and round. I tried to take a picture of it, which as it turns out, doesn’t do it the slightest bit of justice. You need a pro camera for moon shots, I think, so you can zoom in a whole lot. And so your flash can illuminate the foreground properly.

What a lousy picture. But I have enough bandwidth on my flickr, so.

Our Yousucks Adventure camp was cancelled at the last minute, as most of the freshmen had not matriculated and hence were not considered ‘real’ NUS students, hence they could not go about on hall camps due to safety issues. Boo. What a pity. The bus went alllll the way to the Far East of Singapore (we are in the west) and alllll the way back. I’d say it was at least a mini-road trip for the freshmen, but since the bus used the expressway, I doubt there was much to see. Bah humbug. I wasn’t on the bus. I was sick in bed.

And now, a funny nonsensical story to round up the day:
I was setting up my printer yesterday. Everything was plugged in, the socket switch was on, and I pressed the button. Nothing. I pressed it again and again. Still nothing. Changed the plug location to another socket. Nothing. I started to panic because the guy who stored my printer for me had jokingly told me that it was damaged, and I began to think that maybe he wasn’t joking after all. I took a good look at my printer and realised I had been pressing the ‘Resume’ button instead of the Power button. Gaaaahhh!
(I can differentiate them now, even with my eyes closed. The Power button has a tiny raised dot in the middle of it.)
In mitigation, I will claim that I was sick and feverish.

Okay, more pictures of Hall Orientation banners.

I don’t know if this is their main banner, since last year they had a huge one that was 3 storeys in length. Either way, it’s quite well-made.

Hoooray! It’s the Eusoff banner! ‘Arete’ is loosely translated as ‘virtue’, or ‘being the best one can be’. It’s Greek, so the entire Orientation programme has a very Ancient Greek flavour to it.

Kent Ridge Hall had their banner up too, but it wasn’t very nice, in my opinion. (I am so mean.) Anyway you can see it from their website, it’s the same design. They’re going with an Ancient Civilisations theme, so you can be a Greek, Roman, Inca, Viking or Egyptian. Yay.

And the senseless photo of the day is:

These sausages were cooked in the microwave oven on “High”. Mistake. As you can see, two of them exploded. I shall remember to only use the “Medium” setting from now on. Plus it’s actually better that way, my noodles don’t get so dry and rubbery.

Xiaxue’s blog just got hacked last night. Now, if someone had hacked it to write evil posts masquerading as her, well, that’s mean but not irretrievable. But no. Whoever did this was so heartless, evil and above all, a huge loser, that he/she deleted every post over the last 3 years. Imagine that. On top of that, the hacker deleted her Gmails, since many comments go there.

That’s not right, man. That’s not even funny. If you have a beef with her, send her an email and debate it intelligently. If she defeats you at the argument, too bad. Swallow it like a reasonable being. And if you STILL have some issues with her and feel like defacing her blog, why not try Net Disaster? It’ll put worms etc on the blog, you feel vindicated, she has a good laugh (after the initial shock) and no one gets hurt.

Obviously whoever deleted her blog posts has a good hacking mind, but no humanity. It’s blogicide, you know? Usually blogicide means blog suicide, which is when someone closes down their blog. This time, it’s blog homicide. It’s like taking someone’s baby and obliterating it from the face of earth. Homicide, that is. In fact, it’s almost like terrorism, isn’t it? It’s a case of “I don’t like you therefore I shall try to hurt you very very badly to ‘teach you a lesson’”. Well you know what? Xiaxue isn’t the one who needs a lesson. It’s the hacker who most desperately needs a lesson, preferably from Cowboy Caleb kicking his/her ass 3 ways to China, followed by public vilification, perhaps via the blogs and columns of the more prominent bloggers.

As for Xiaxue herself, she’s getting up and dusting herself off. And I daresay, she’ll be bolder and better than ever. Words can’t break her down, you know? And she’s looking at legal action now. If I were the hacker, I’d be scared. Very very scared. Bringing down a hated blogger suddenly doesn’t seem so glamourous on your criminal record, does it?

And for you Xiaxue-haters out there who want to flame my post as being one from her many many sheep, go ahead. Cos in the end, I know which side I’m on. When a blogger, no matter who it is, is attacked in such an awful manner, it is an attack on our community.

We don’t like terrorists. In any form.

Noose is still very quiet but things in Yousucks are beginning to hot up as the Orientation teams of each hall gear up for the final stretch. Banners are unfurled, cheers are practised, and I go around snapping pictures of random Orientation-related events.

Their banner is so simple. Hmph. A minimalist study. I’ll need to take a picture of OURS so you can see the difference. But actually they were quite smart to save time and effort on the banner so as to concentrate on more pertinent stuff.

Remember the 2-dimensional cows Cowboy Caleb blogged about? One of them left the herd and migrated all the way to Yousucks from downtown. And it seems to have developed an attitude.

Bleah to you too, Cow!

Tomorrow: The Yousucks banner. Wait for the sun to rise first then only I take the picture, yah?

It’s so amusing. I open the paper, flip a few pages and see a familiar face accompanying an article. My worst fears are realized. He’s done it again.

My dear friend Sam, currently at Yale, has got himself into the paper. He’s launched an initiative to spread the word about US universities among secondary school students. A lot of them don’t apply there because the costs can be prohibitive, but schools like Yale have a financial aid programme that’s kinda cool, cos it doesn’t costs the parents anything. The student works his/her way through school.

Perhaps I should tell my old secondary school to call him up. He’ll have no end of fawning teenage girl fans there. Hehehe.